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Beautiful Imperfection

by Apojii

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1.
They'll say you're worthless until you've made it Hold you down til you're sedated Fill your lungs til satiated And watch all your dreams fade away They'll tell you what you do, will never work Go to school, get a job, make it work Work hard so you don't have to work And put off tomorrow what you can do today. They'll form their own opinions Hope they never lose context Reach their own conclusions No matter what comes next. I was meant to live for so much more But I lost myself Though the road may be long Persevere, Prove them wrong It's character through all that is imperfect Beautiful Imperfection
2.
Drive 04:17
Drive Just keep driving... There's nothing behind you Home is just a state of mind one day it'll find you Just keep driving Give me the courage to yet live My enemy's a state of mind Courage to yet give A piece of mine bridge The gap I've been putting yellow tape around Funny how stars shine brightest when light ain't around Darkness in my shadow Darkness is my past The demons in my mind Are the wind beneath my mast The glue beneath my cast Im Feeling so alone The world becomes my mask And I become the clone The thought of tears would be perfect Just seeing a glimpse of emotion would be worth it Instead of sitting in this room trying to conjure what I don't even care about Care about Roommates think I've overdosed Asking me my where abouts But I don't feel like talking The fight is with my mind My lips will hold the secrets My eyes will tell the lies My mind becomes distracted My hands always misguide Reading between the lines Validation between your thighs Who cares, like the bee-gees I'm just stayin alive I could go home to the place where I used to reside But now I'm sitting here thinking Of doing nothing this weekend Except being in solitude with flooded eyes Man they think they know what I'm about Im about They dont really know what I'm about I'm about Love I talk the same story they ask me why They don't get it I could go home But I think I'd rather drive. Drive Just keep driving... There's nothing behind you Home is just a state of mind one day it'll find you Just keep driving Only people I call are Jen and my mom One breaks me outta my shell And One rings the alarm So independent Constantly telling myself I need them The load is heavy to not have Somebody to lean on Blindly fishing for attention Only way I can get it Is to be committed To the music I reinvented dreams seems so Far away it's hard to stay committed I bare it all in front of you still scared of your opinion Damn The people I'm writting for don't even listen like saying You have aids will make them judge you fore they ask how pretty set in my ways Traded Jesus for cash cows Tried to slow down But life is moving too fast now I've always been a rebel As soon as you gave me bass I've always wanted treble As soon as I knew the box you put me in I would advocate the devil disputes were up for debate Cause my opinion never settles I see 50 shades of grey Clouded by my vision Pray my soul hell never take Thoughts of driving off this bridge Demons keep following me Trying to find out where I live I think in in the clear (They keep drawing near) Boosting my career (They keep drawing near) My Love They talk the same story Asked myself why I don't get it I could go home But I think I'd rather drive. Drive
3.
Jack of hearts I regret all the arguments we never had I regret all the times that I made you sad I loved all the moments when I made you mad Cuz what we had Looked even better with Make up sex And all the other things I can't forget Still wondering what's next sitting here waiting anticipating to hear your list of regrets Hoping one involves me But Instead of looking weak I boflexed Have I been blind? For the first time in my life I feel I've opened up my eyes Tried to define love, it's Really hard without you hun Love at first sight, had to be true huh Like frank ticheli so many shades of blue huh Damn I gotta let go of you still searching but until I let go of this choke hold For certain, I won't know Until we unveil the curtain If its broken My hearts hurting It's been shot a couple times but its still working A faint past is still lurking Haunting me when I'm flirting I can not move on Wanting you back Analyzing where you could be on a map I even wrote a couple times But you moved on I wish I could walk and talk with you Brain tells me what not to do Heart saying you've got to! Don't know who to follow So confused and hollow The one girl I fell in love with How could something right be so wrong. They all wanted to be you huh Was it love? Why do I still dream of a perfect world with you? Got me wondering lately Do you think about the same things Like could I still be your prom king Like could I ever be your prom king And when you're feeling troubled I hope you look up above you And know that somebody loved you And I don't wanna cause you no trouble But these four eyes and drinks got me seeing way more than double What kind of world Would this be without you? Stop! Found out Pain was too heavy. So i Bowed Out.
4.
Never Fail 02:31
Never fail They must want me to fail By not paying attention I gave'em all my demo But only few would listen Man I'm fraking tired of these Snowflake jiggas That say that you're hot But don't wanna see you make 6 figures Man I must be crazy Daily, 9-5 daily On my grind daily No sleep, and I don't eat Still rap's vigilante Dropped unception unfortunately that uped the ante Now Is that orfeo? No it can't be Apojii's Got a tear drop tat For those who can't see The cheddar comes slowly From those who don't know me So explore the flow So you can hear my story Cuz I want the fame and glory Glory Hallelujah! Finally something Different Ima bring it to ya Students got dumbed down Ima have ta school ya 2 years of dues Man, This Ain't nothing new bro (But you haven't made it yet?) I'm just sayin i still my favorite Like kanye I got class Musical Baccalaureate Opportunity comes Own it On my way to the top and didn't need a nigga moment Go figure. I'm a sonic marauder I gotta work harder Who's that in your ear? Taking over air waves So fly and you aint got no kryptonite So I can never fail here I'm a sonic marauder I gotta work harder Who's that in your ear? Taking over air waves So fly and you ain't got no kryptonite So I can never fail here I haven't heard from you in a while! Sorry was too busy making a name For myself To call thee Up all night taking flight Like mike with a spalding Man I am so appalling But my music's Enthralling Threw my cards at the sky Said I'm all in Flow so smooth operators call in Fear Embalming I walked in a church and exclaimed It's king James over all things! Damn Weeping angels Don't ever blink your eyes Cuz the Kodak's in the moment And nothing is a surprise I dream big It was all a dream kid So BIG Didn't know if I was dead or alive I am not alone like the "i" in my iPhone I write on til I flipped sides like a cylon I'm head strong Can't let bygones be bygones Gladiator to these haters ready to get my fight on Looking great for ladies Moving weight with tony Horton Confidence skyrocketing branchin out like abortion i can't tell what's worse Two girls with no cups or one cup And if they talk sh** It's just stuck up I'm a sonic marauder I gotta work harder Who's that in your ear? Taking over air waves So fly and you aint got no kryptonite So I can never fail here
5.
Eternal 04:59
Eternal Eternal flame Take it back to how it used to be When it was just you and me Truthfully didn't think we need a 3rd Degree Til I noticed you were burning me Flames always been between her and me We're a pretty tough crew Truth And I know she loves you Truth Now im sitting behind enemy lines Wanting freedom From You I kept teasin them How they Eating all the garbage that they feedin them Road less traveled deceiving them guided but the heathens that were heedin them Damn for a second Can i see your fire Or Should I wait to find it Been in the dark for so long I don't think I'd even know light if I stood behind it 25 years sweat and tears A whole generation and she survived it Never was one for wiling But the plight kept the flight on autopilot She gets so excited Knowing that her boy Returns when he runs his mileage Troubles dont last always You try to remind us It's not over til we close our eyelids So I keep them open Hoping one day Our love will keep your doors from closing For a while I been out of order The world gets colder As I get older And if I go Please provide a holder For her A masseuse to rub out The hurt And I pray one day when were dead and gone away we can say it worked If I'm on a rise then I'm taking her with me Don't attempt me And with that I'm No longer blinded Found the light was always Within me Right now it's dim I just have to figure out how it works again Then to let it shine And I won't give up without trying If darkness ever falls on me Light the way so that we can see Share eternity together If darkness ever falls on me Light the way so that we can see Share eternity together Let her know we gon' change but we'll always remain eternal Eternal flame Can you at least light my fire I see the light ahead but the dark divides us I always wanted to be wiser Defeating giants like Goliath I see the walls you put up inside her A building to scrape the sky with Appealing to the life that resides behind hers Theyre too close so we barbed the wires Neuroscience, now it's you and me. And these other man made appliance They supply us, with everything we need Except all that's inside us. Accept all that's inside us Sometime we need small reminders Lost in the dark makes us feel blind cuz no sad songs can spark the lighters. If they're trying, They can't find us. Shoot we can't find us! Admitting to ourselves exactly what's behind us pile of bones, ashes to fine dust Reach out my hands, and that suffices Excuse the pews are filled with vices I try hard to hidem where the light ends But you keep fightin to enlighten Man It's frightening cuz the sky is falling I hear you calling, as it caves in Who need Savin? It's a boulder dash, and im ballin Drop everything that you haulin Cuz you can't fold once youre allin No love in a game when you Fallin Push you forward, I'm the pawlin Don't look back There's nothing there Paranormal Living dead The light is only a few steps ahead Waive the bed Revere the grave Eternal flame Light the way don't let me be the last thing that you save Sacrifice, look what I gave for the life we made So we'd be ok If darkness ever falls on me Light the way so that we can see Share eternity together If darkness ever falls on me Light the way so that we can see Share eternity together Let her know we gon' change but we'll always remain eternal
6.
Solar 03:34
Solar My thoughts are getting flooded They say we're at the top and Only heavens right above us But what of those below us They can not control us And if they try, I'll have to send them my condolence. Solace For all the money that they could've made... For the hours that they've been enslaved For the people writing books about it For the connections that were never made Do it They say were only 25 once Why am I living like Im only gonna die once Screw it I want to live the American dream I got pennies for my thoughts Thoughts busting at the seams Filling up my vaults And slowly I see the cost I want nickels for my thoughts You could call it the Pentecost Til it's over Only one mower And only one lawn Pop my collared greens To get this cash flow mow on Only one life? dream on Like Aerosmith We on Some other worldness woke up To be reborn So I passed away It's sad to say But now I'm Effin living Finley got the message from the sender That was sendin it Gettin it They tell you how to do it , but they've never done it Blowing hundreds in the wind and gettin nothin from it And then you feel the plummet While im still reaching for the stars! You trying to find the summit while I'm resting here on mars Revealing all these scars Ain't no point in hiding them (Aint no point in hiding man) Cuz I'm on my solar I'm on my solar Cuz I'm so loved so loved so loved so loved so loved so loved Perspiration from this brain storm Drowned it out Wishing on a star to see the stars when the fames gone If the skys the limit youre not seeing far enough Head is in the clouds Above them They see the sun and the rains gone for now When it comes back? What about that? fade back to a black reality Acting like its their reality Honestly they don't know how to be Sorry if you doubted me Like they killing mes With little stings like killer bees Waiting for the moment To spread my wings My Truth will open mouths Like Chick fil a did in the south Just sayin I heard it in the news That it's ok to hate if you disagree with a personal view Discover your truth But Old news is old news I am making that new new Like your parents do in a bedroom Man it's comedy how Many zombies can surround you But you can't see the fact that it's a dead room Cuz you are dead too I feel so alive Lost my identity got nothing to hide I am everyone and still me Experience instilled me Cuz I'm on my solar And that's all I need to be Til its Over. solar
7.
Vampire 03:07
Vampire Make a heartbeat for breakfast Mama says that I'm reckless Working these late hours Knowing i wont regret this Living a double life Tipping toeing around the edges Wonder when I'll have to take a bullet to the head Man First off, ima go an eat cha brain Give you a little hope Then I'll devour yours dreams Man Im an FN animal Eat you out like a cannibal Hail from San Antonio Remember I'm the Alamo I'm the cherry on top A la maude She thought I was so sweet her little tootsie roll She fell in love, I broke her heart Geronimo I played the whole field like that bunny from the Warner bros I don't make looney tunes Looking for that real love All about my realness no synthetic true blood Man I'm so hungry Fame is like a new drug Flow so hard Man ima need a new plug Man I spit hot fire like spyro Spreading the gospel While you making them zygotes But What the hell do I know Leavem on a high note Got Sailermoon on a hook Like em did with dido Why should I cry though Highest point in an orbit Apojii got that new sound And You can not ignore it I want the whole truth nothing but it Cool James, ladies love it Im the underground I Glisten when I'm above it Cuz ima vampire I'm a mess But you are to D 2 And I'm too legit to quit you the only drug i'm addicted to But I can not control you Eases the pain to watch you hanging With them gross dudes Metamorph call me bat mayne Listen to the growth No rogaine Got with the phantom menace Leader of a new age Swag out the ass Splitting legs Like Johnny cage We don't lose Unless we give In Moneys for the getting Nonviolently getting mine Like sit ins Wont be caught dead with my hand out Ill let you see the green cuz im leaving All my bread out Damn I could end up dead alone Immortal combat You should leave the bed at home Tonight's no new moon shes Seated right in front of me Star and yellow bone You can down my sunny d Show them what I'm gonna be Black man in the future ish Call me billy D feeling like a refugee thinking outside the box focused on the inner me Caught me red handed like shaggy but It wasn't me It was the vampire I've already died twice If i Make it to the afterlife Then I just might Never have to die again Life's a game Saving 1 ups for my friends play the game manipulate the way it ends No YOLO Trapped inside my mind though Like unicorn in a rhino I'm fine though Just a Moniker change Still them same But I'm takin over everything Like mj's vitiligo whoa
8.
Lifesaver 03:12
Lifesaver Graduated college Working in a 9-5 On the side getting knowledge Trying ya keep the dream alive The poor dream to swim and not take a dive If a Black Olympian can swim then I will survive You can call me lion king I got so much pride For my city its a pity I ain't even tryin Want to see the world didn't have a dime So I found a girl Now I ain't got the time Expensive To chill with Friends it's So sad I gotta pick which Bills get Paid first so the biscuits Bisquick Man, Im So sick cuz No meals get eatin Til we get to party on the weekend Matter fact I'm bout to set it off Beacon Peeking At the crowd just to insure us The mood is set and the temp is tempura Haters keep hating Thinking ima screw up Super sayin on the mic Cuz I flow coola No ice unlike freeza And slick Rick the ruler Boss of my business I be on that Koopa On in a minute Til we all in the gettin And you better pay attention Cuttin cheddar is the mission Got a family I'm missin And reality is kickin when I'm down But I flow another round til I'm finished Lifes a shot in the dark Live in the night and Hide from the lark Better study for that paper Cuz you gon need a lifesaver You gonna need a lifesaver If you gon build a skyscraper You gonna need a lifesaver Ayo pimpin get your paper They'll tell you how to do it They never did Tell you to pursue it But they don't believe in it Man, if you can dance Here's your chance Even without a degree Dead presidents Necromancy But wait wait I'm supposed to graduate in debt Leave school For a job that i cant even get Now that don't even make sense So we'll pray to be saved by the government Damn Or we can marry rich But theres only 1% So how am I supposed to make rent I'm occupying wall street Pitching a tent Bitching at the man But he wont even give me a cent. Damn, I just wanna go HOV and show everybody how to move in a room fulla vultures And never be consumed when they try to control ya Money talks volumes But ima sound soldier Keepin it 1 hundred Fear, Ain't scare of it My motus oporandi Is to men's betterment So if they try to pull the floor From up under me They'll find a firmly planted foundation in the sediment On in a minute Til we all in the gettin And you better pay attention Cuttin cheddar is the mission Got a family I'm missin And reality is kickin when I'm down But I flow another round til I'm finished Lifes a shot in the dark Live in the night and Hide from the lark Better study and get that paper Cuz you gon need a lifesaver You gonna need a lifesaver If you gon build a skyscraper You gonna need a lifesaver Ayo pimpin get your paper A-P O-J-I-I Guess I stay so fly Now look into my eyes and Tell me where the disguise is Why would I try to hide? I've got nothing.
9.
Future 03:44
Future He's never been in this predicament Feels his soul exposed and some are sick of it As his Clock keeps ticking and His heart beats quickening Moved to a new city Used to be gelatin, but now his skin keeps thickening Gets angry But He's the bigger man Reminiscent bout visions Vocal cord collisions Doing karaoke when More adults than kids would listen Now he's doing it big in his fathers image A father in his life only a slight Percentage A father who was there from the Beginning He Never considered himself a bastard Built up his endurance More hp than Hewlett Packard Wasn't his fathers fault he was around a lot But he didn't spin off like family matters Damn don't think its Hard to be him At least his father that would come and see him Every other weekend Said keep your nose to the grind stone And like a museum always keeping his eyes on the future They asked me why i did it and i said its for the future. Stay commited man I did it for the future Every other weekend He was seeking his fathers approval His father was proud that his mother was fruitful All around the world in the cities his father flew to he called his son in the voice Disney characters until he knew who Was calling I remember bawling in the back of the car Listening to a mixtape he probably sent from Germany Being all that he could be Reunited We were divided for so long but didn't seem to be i loved it when he phoned home I was 2 when they divorced Turned 8, when he moved to San Antone They asked him What you packing so fast for He said, all I could ask for Before he finished He knew he had to get back for the future They asked him why he did it and he said its for the future. Stay commited man I did it for the future Damn I could talk about the lives that made mine. But is it your business when Im crossing those state lines You followed your path I'm trying to create mine If immigrants the verse then these bars are what I'm behind. trapped in a maze Mint conditioning these raps again Practicing Turning into A pathogen My dad knew it wasn't a phase I just want to be viral Infectious with a flow From the tap like spinal Wont stop til I go ghost And I know he'll be in front of me Til the dum dums don't summon me When I break the chains You'll see the beast My fathers will will be unleash Sampson Killed it, crowd decease But if we build, they'll come to see The future
10.
Candy (Terms and Conditions) I Wanna rap about the life I never had Insecure. Intertwine good and the bad I'm a mess didnt do my chores mom and dad But my life is a lists of terms and conditions my life is a lists of terms and conditions my life is a lists of terms and conditions It doesn't have to make sense Just agree So we can move on. Human Homo sapien cent ipad I'm not bad like the marriage your parents first had Even though mine are Separate Ima Spit flames Like a sweet chariot Kid games Man you know I ain't scared of them And all the other competition I'm better than Went from demos to EP to mixtape to lp They Can't tell me this won't get me the letterman I'm a pimp other rappers f you To pay me Yellow brick grind Now I get Dorothy's daily Long loneliness I used looked like porkys baby Moved weight with tony Horton Now the porkys pay me You've heard of two somes And three somes Now I get it when they call me handsome They all call me handsome My mom calls me handsome And when they switch genders Like Marylyn Manson Of they wanna skat like Sing alongs a with Hanson I wanna hold them all for ransom And maybe have a baby on the floor While I'm dancing And make it through a hard time Like i had cancer And act like I got all the answers But I don't got them I just want some Although some nights I just want fun. While they're Acting like their life's condition Change it,switch it, reinvent it Acting like your life's condition Change it,switch it, reinvent it You won't hear me complaining This is the life Love me like Raymond Live for the nights Of no stress or payments Man on fire like Usher Raymond Let it burn. I Wanna rap about the life I never had Insecure. Intertwine good and the bad I'm a mess didnt do my chores mom and dad But my life is a lists of terms and conditions my life is a lists of terms and conditions my life is a lists of terms and conditions It doesn't have to make since Just agree So we can move on. Someone tell the dj turn it up It's a stick up Someone tell her she's getting too nuts Bout to shoot some hot scotch While i go Double Dutch in The back seat and shotguns for my little cousins Lettm see the world a little so they know I love them You can have your whole cake i made a bakers dozen +1 get it? You can't touch this im Hot like a fraking oven I don't really go out clubbing All I wanna do is make music Im Nike I just doos it Finish entertaining them and watch them lose it When I'm done they can cut the swoosh and 100 years ago it would've been a nuis.. sance Since it isn't Count my blessings All the while Getting spinach And America puts me in an Image I'm a suburban kid North west side of San Antonio They used to call me Oreo You know how the racial story goes Man it's so dumb I'm done but not really when they, Acting like your life's condition Change it,switch it, reinvent it Acting like your life's condition I Changed it, i switched it, and reinvented it They must think I'm crazy Intellectual property and stocks Don't phase me Died a while back Now I'm pushing daisys Still being who I am And not what the make me
11.
Antidote 05:00
Antidote Its been a long time coming But you know I've made it now And I will sojourn the truth railroad of the underground Back in '93 It was Mom and me A trinity Missin one but we found a separate peace 2 was all we needed Man I felt completed If We had each others backs We'd never feel defeated Immovable force She never let me self degrade Whoop my behind Just to remind me That we came from slaves I was bullied a little bit never an invalid Grew up And faught the battles for those other kids I could never be broke Behind the mic like Tito Loving all the people Cuz She told me we were equal Sandra was the prequel To show me some wouldnt think so I didn't believe it Until that night, Instant replay: TiVo She occupies a soft spot in my heart But Her father didn't want His grand kids to look like Negros She watched tv shows but This was murder he wrote I learn from Heros To feel like I needed zero World lays in my hands Maybe I can fritos Other kids who got judged and prayed for life repos But the past is What we can't get back now She found another man Her father didn't need to pat down Im Written my own path Keeping my frequency fly labeled myself an outcast My Castles in the sky Hook: Even with a Heart of Gold Some dont want to let it show I wont forget it I won't forget it I wont forget it, No We all know that the world is cold but you were the antidote you were the antidote I won't forget it, No Back in middle school Mrs. Van Nest Always wanted to contest policy was honest I was living thoughtless She saw I was flawed Thought that I could flaw less Tried to see the God in me like Lucy lawless But it didn't work did it She asked me if I read that book for class said I did it. I was just kidding But that was not the point She saw a need for precision I was hitting and missing Man She Wouldnt let me rest or settle for nothing If I wanted something Found my lyrics on the floor And I wished for that second coming She Told me a cussing was lazy I couldn't think of nothin else Not a valedictorian But im Top shelf give it away Give it away Give it away now She gave me a way out. And nothing was on my mind Except that grind to stay out I hope that one day she get to see this bouquet now Nothing but respect for her And her position she said All you gotta do is listen And comprehend There is nothing you can't do I'm am your teacher Win or lose My mission is to advance you Hook It's crazy how it goes It's crazy no one knows what we'll become until we get there and we'll get there Bridge: My Inner Jii My inner me My lonely thoughts My inner Peace Orfeo got put to sleep so you can call me Apojii I will not Forget it, no I won't forget it, no debted to whom the credit goes I won't forget those sacrifices of men and mice it's amazing tomorrow we'll shed the vices I will not forget it, no Hook out

about

Darkness meets light to inspire what surrounds. Scars tell the tales in a delicacy of sounds.

credits

released February 26, 2013

Dark meets light. (period) I'd like to thank everyone that helped me make this album possible. To Frances, thank you so much for not being scared to record! You don't know how many people I tried to collaborate with that fell through. Thanks to Z, Jillian, Jen, Nick, Megan, John, Brad, Sarah and Alex for giving me feedback! It's amazing how much you can do in 2 weeks. Thanks Nick and Annalisa for the amazing video! Thanks Mom and Dad… that should go without saying… I wrote 2 songs for you guys! Thanks to my family both near and far! You are all in my thoughts. Jeannae! The song you did will come out soon! =] Thanks to Fosho and D. Mo for having me when they do they're stuff, and Phantom Leader for helping me do shows. To ASP, I would not be here had it not been for you guys. Thanks Kalleen for the album art help. To all my mentors growing up… Ron, Mr. D, Mrs. Vannest, Mrs. Schweers. Y'all were the inspiration for Antidote. Keep being great teachers. To everyone that supported me with Orfeo, thank you. Apojii would have given up had it not been for your encouragement. Fear nothing, and live your dreams.

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Apojii Austin, Texas

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